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Sophie and I grab a table outside at Dupont Circle’s Le Pain Quotidien. Amid the din of traffic, we chat about her move to DC, how to move someone from “work friend” to “real friend,” hosting when you have roommates, growing up in Chicago proper, cartwheels, and talking with strangers.
Samuel: What brought you to the DMV?
Sophie: I grew up in Chicago. I feel strongly about being from the city – the first 14 years of my life were in Chicago, and then we moved to the suburbs so that I could be closer to a Jewish high school. Then, for college, I went to GW. My freshman year was completely online, so I felt that my time in DC wasn’t done after college. I stuck around, and now I have a full-time job here.
Samuel: Were you familiar with the city before coming here for college?
Sophie: The college application process was a nightmare and a shot in the dark for me. I just applied all over. But I applied and visited GW and loved it!
Samuel: What is keeping you here now?
Sophie: My people! A lot of my people are here. I’ve created a really strong community of people I love and feel deeply connected to. And, I love being in a city.
Samuel: Why?
Sophie: I love the hustle and bustle. I love that everybody’s always out and about. There’s always something happening. There’s a million different types of people. When I moved to the suburbs for high school, I was grateful for it – I had my own room, we got a dog – but it was boring.
Samuel: How did you find your community post-college?
Sophie: In college, it was easy. I just went to Chabad every Friday night and Hillel all the time. Post-grad, I worked at the EDCJCC, and that created a built-in community for me. They hired a lot of people my age after I started, and we’ve become really close friends.
And, a lot of my close friends from college have stuck around. Most of them are Jewish and even if they’re not, I feel as though they are, because they’re just with me and my friends all the time. It’s just naturally happened that I always have somewhere to go Friday night.
Samuel: How do you sense when someone is a ‘work friend’ versus a…you know, real friend?
Sophie: I’m sure they’ll read this. It sort of happened instantly. I’m very chatty, and it was my first real job out of college, and I was still learning where the lines were. Not with my boss or supervisors. That was always a professional thing. But then there’s another girl that walks into the office and I’m like: I love your skirt. We should hang out and get brunch.
So it happened very quickly, and now they’re some of my closest friends. I felt like I was hanging out with all my girlfriends, and also we had some work to do.
Samuel: What else is feeling alive Jewishly?
Sophie: I was at Washington Hebrew Congregation last night and heard Jon Polin and Rachel Goldberg-Polin speak. There was a question about their Jewish practice, and Rachel said that it’s like asking someone how it feels to be them without their skin on. It [wouldn’t be] me anymore.
So it’s very hard to separate my practice from who I am, because it’s all wrapped up in one. The way I talk, the way I’m moving my hands right now. I feel like everything I do is Jewish. But in terms of what I do, Shabbat and Friday nights have always been very important. We always had family over on Friday nights. Now, I’ve created that with my friends, whether we’re going to Chabad or hosting or going to a Shabbat Cluster. That’s what’s really grounded me.
Samuel: You’ve brought up hosting a couple times. What are your priorities as a host?
Sophie: Before I answer that, I want to give a shoutout to my [former] roommate Emma, who I love to pieces. I would always ask: Do you mind if I have 17 people over? And she was always saying: Yes, what can I do? How can I help? I really appreciated how open she was to it.
I’m still working on my policy of [when to have] people bringing food. When I don’t have to, I won’t. I love feeding people and I want to have provided that for them. It’s so easy to go somewhere and not have to cook dinner. I try my best to make sure I’m the one cooking.
Samuel: Okay, a few quick ones before we go. What are you bad at?
Sophie: I can’t do a cartwheel. Also, mental math.
Samuel: Do you think everyone else can do cartwheels?
Sophie: No. But it’s something I think about often. I went to camp for a million years and I can’t do a cartwheel.
Samuel: What are you feeling proud about?
Sophie: I’m really proud of the friends I have here and the community I’ve built. I feel deeply connected to them.
Samuel: You can invite any three people to Shabbat dinner. Who are you bringing?
Sophie: This could go a couple ways. I could talk about dead relatives I’d love to have there. Or, I could say Troye Sivan and a bunch of other celebrities.
I would probably say my Zadie on my Mom’s side and my grandmother on my Dad’s side. And then for the crazy fun of it…Martin Buber. Or Joseph Soloveitchik. We’d all ask: Why are you here? But it’d be great conversation, and I think my Zadie would appreciate it.
Samuel: I’m stealing this question a bit from Rabbi Jenna of Sixth & I. They talked about how we’re laying the foundation for the next generation of Judaism. What’s the Judaism that you want to be known for passing down?
Sophie: Jewish joy and Jewish pride. I want people to say: Sophie talked to everybody. There wasn’t a stranger she didn’t smile at or a cashier she didn’t start a conversation with. To me, those things are connected. In the world today, everybody is scared and nervous and freaking out and divided about something. We can talk about large scale ways to break down barriers, but if you’re not willing to also look at someone across the street as someone just like you, we can’t do those bigger projects. It starts there and it’s so simple. Not easy, necessarily, but simple.
Samuel: Last one. Finish the sentence: When Jews of the DMV gather…
Sophie: There’s a lot of snacks and laughing.
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