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Heather and I meet at Teamania in Rockville one cloudy November afternoon to chat about her time in Spain, where she spent three years in Madrid and another two in Mallorca. Read the full conversation to hear about her experience as a teaching assistant, mastering the tortilla de patatas flip, exploring DC Jewish spaces, and more!
Samuel: You grew up in the DMV. What brought you back?
Heather: I was in Spain for five years as a teaching assistant, and realized in the final year that I loved living in Spain, but I felt like I couldn’t grow anymore in the job itself. I wanted to be doing something where I could grow and learn, and it would be hard to find a different job because I don’t have Spanish citizenship. My friend was getting married back home, and I thought: I’m going for the wedding…what if I just stayed and spent some time with friends and family, and see what happens?
Samuel: What has stuck out to you after being away for so long?
Heather: There’s a lot of little things I notice now. Like whenever they bring out free water with ice at a restaurant, I get excited. That isn’t really a thing in Europe! It also feels weird to hear so much English around me instead of Spanish, although I appreciate that I have been able to use some of my Spanish since coming home. I’m definitely feeling a bit of reverse culture shock sometimes.
Something I especially noticed was how much more communal Spain is than the US. It feels a lot more individualistic here. I also appreciated that the work-life balance in Spain felt much more…balanced! They always say, in the US people live to work, but in Spain people work to live.
Samuel: Your family is still in Rockville, right?
Heather: My parents are from New York, but I was born and raised here in Rockville, yeah. When I got older and went to college, I realized how special it is that I lived so close to DC. Since then, I’ve wanted to explore the area more and, now that I’m back, I’ve been really trying to explore parts of DC that I haven’t been to. Especially with the Jewish community, I appreciate that it is so big and there are so many options.
Samuel: Where have you been exploring?
Heather: I’ve always heard about how great Sixth & I is, so coming home I really wanted to check it out. I’ve been to a few Shabbats and have had great experiences there. Whenever I go, I can’t help but stare at the ceiling, like: Wow!
I also really like the Den Collective because it feels like an intimate group with cozy vibes. Rabbi Emmanuel went to the same rabbinical school that my friend is currently going to, so I knew it would be good. I know a lot of my friend’s colleagues, and they’re very cool people who’ve helped me think about Judaism in different ways.
Samuel: What sort of different ways?
Heather: I’ve definitely experienced some Jewish programs where it feels very “this is what we do, and that’s it” or there’s one right way to be Jewish. At my friend’s school, there’s just a lot more diversity in the students who are becoming rabbis, and we’ve had conversations about how learning with people from so many backgrounds and identities has influenced her learning. It’s cool – that’s the point of Judaism, that you can interpret it differently and mold it a little to best fit your life and what you connect with. I appreciate that.
Samuel: What was your Jewish community like in Spain?
Heather: That first year in Madrid, I didn’t know any Jewish people. I thought: It’s fine! I can practice my Judaism on my own how I want. But I eventually realized I was feeling a little lonely as a Jew. I realized that I missed celebrating the holidays with other people who grew up celebrating too, who know the traditions, who you don’t have to explain everything to. I loved sharing my culture with my non-Jewish friends, but it’s just a different feeling to practice Judaism with other Jews.
I wanted to get involved with the local community, but wasn’t sure how. I ended up learning that the Madrid Moishe Pod had an opening and decided to check it out. After meeting the other residents, I decided to move in, and became super involved in Jewish life in Madrid. There are tons of great organizations for young Jewish people to get involved in – kind of similar to how the DC community is!
Everyone was very welcoming and I loved that I was able to meet Jewish people from all over the world. The community is a bit more hidden – Jewish communities in Europe tend to be very careful because of antisemitism – but once you find your way into the Madrid Jewish community, you will see that it is a big, beautiful, diverse, incredibly fun group of people.
Samuel: Spain has some incredible food. Is there anything you’re bringing back into your own cooking?
Heather: I definitely use olive oil now more than butter. I got used to that. A few different people taught me how to make the tortilla de patata and I actually made it for my parents last week. I’m trying to perfect it – you have to flip it, and it can just fall apart, and then you have scrambled eggs. But I can do the flip now.
Samuel: A few quick ones to close. What’s something you’re bad at?
Heather: Multitasking. I want to do everything all at once and then I get overwhelmed. Or I take on too much – I’m bad at sitting back and allowing myself to just participate, rather than try to lead.
Samuel: What are you feeling proud about right now?
Heather: I’m proud of all the things I’ve done in the last five years, living in Spain. I’m proud of the fact that I chose to live in a different place and step out of my comfort zone. I learned a lot, and I have a lot of memories and great friends from that. I would not be who I am today without that experience.
A lot of people say: “Wow, I can’t believe you did that, I could never do that.” But you can! Anyone can. If you are passionate about something, you can figure out how to make it happen.
Samuel: You mentioned getting to explore DC in a way you couldn’t growing up. What’s that been like?
Heather: I went to Decades for the first time.
Samuel: Ew.
Heather: Yeah, I didn’t know.
Samuel: You’re hosting Shabbat dinner and can invite any three people. Who are you bringing?
Heather: The first person that comes to mind is Doja Cat. She’s funny and cool and Jewish. Then maybe Adam Brody. Or just all my friends.
I also think it would be fun to have Linda from Bob’s Burgers there. I love her and I think she’d be fun. She’s a queen. She and Bob really balance each other. He’s all grumpy and she’ll be like: C’mon, Bob! La la la la laaaaa.
Samuel: Last one. Finish the sentence: When Jews of the DMV gather…
Heather: It’s going to be a good time.
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