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Eric and I met at Big Bear Cafe for a wonderful conversation one brilliantly sunny DC autumn afternoon (complete with plenty of appearances from hardy October mosquitoes, and someone on the patio playing the entirety of Chappell Roan’s The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess very loudly on their phone). Read the full chat to hear all about Eric’s 3000 kilometer walking tour this year, finding Jewish community in unexpected places, living lease-less, and what makes someone a good wedding guest.
Samuel: What brought you to the DMV?
Eric: I went to GW for college!
Samuel: You and I are both from Cherry Hill, New Jersey, and I remember coming down to DC for school trips and whatnot growing up. Did you have a similar experience, or was coming to GW your first exposure to the city?
Eric: My dad used to work for the government, so every year he would have to come to DC for work and my mom, brother, and I would stay in the Embassy Suites, hang out, and go to museums. And then, of course, we had some school trips. I remember, one time, a kid jumping off the steps at the Jefferson Memorial, our first stop, and breaking his ankle. An incredible start.
Samuel: What kept you in the area after college?
Eric: I graduated college in 2016, and so –
Samuel: You graduated college in 2016?
Eric: Yeah. I’m 30. How old did you think I was?
Samuel: I honestly thought we were the same age.
Eric: Nope! Anyway, I like being here. I like seeing my friends. I have been traveling a lot, so I don’t have a lease, but I find that, most of the time, people have rooms for me. Mo and Margarita [Editor’s note: our mutual friends!] refer to their second bedroom as “Eric’s room.” When I’m in America, it’s like: I shouldn’t be here unless I’m actively seeing all these people I enjoy.
Samuel: Tell me more about your community. How have you built that?
Eric: The foundation is from GW and being really involved in Jewish life there. Then, a lot of my friends stayed [in the DMV] and built Jewish lives here. So that’s easy for me: having Shabbat dinners with friends, or playing football on Saturdays [Editor’s note: Want to play two-hand touch football on Saturdays? Email me!]. Now, a lot of my friends are involved in DC Minyan, and I find the community to be really wonderful.
And then…I don’t know, you meet Jews! And Jews love introducing each other to other Jews. I very much enjoy doing Jewish things, especially with young people. Being with friends, it makes me more energized to do Jewish stuff.
Samuel: It feels like a very telling conditional statement you used earlier: “When I’m in America…” I’m curious about what your Jewish practice looks like when you are traveling and not with this established community.
Eric: There have definitely been moments where I’m traveling and I’m just like: I need to go find a Chabad and go for a Friday night dinner. I was in southeast Asia, traveling solo, and meeting people, but not Jewish people. There are those moments when you just want to have a Shabbat dinner and be surrounded by Jewish people. If I’m at a Shabbat dinner in Hanoi with a hundred people who I haven’t met, who can’t speak to me in English, I know that they have a shared experience with me. There’s a base level of familiarity. Though, funny enough, it turned out that one of the guys there had actually somehow met my brother in Montana. Small world.
Samuel: You walked the Camino de Santiago this summer. What was the spiritual resonance of that for you?
Eric: It’s funny, I met very few Catholics. I had a core group of ten or so friends that I made – we’d walk and have dinner and drinks together – and they were all pretty much atheist or agnostics. Churches are very pretty, and I think if you go into enough churches every day, staying in these places that people find to be spiritual, it affirms your own personal faith. Like, there’s something holy going on here – how does that reflect on what I consider to be holy? There are times when I’m walking into a chapel or church and find myself saying the Shema.
There’s a reason humans have been doing pilgrimages for so long. I turned 30 and decided I was going to hike 3000 kilometers. I like traveling solo, but not being alone. I wanted to find places where I could walk and see pretty stuff, but still meet people.
Samuel: Do you feel transformed?
Eric: I don’t think I’ve ever been transformed. I think of it more as being like when you get an update to your phone. It’s 16.2 instead of 16.1. I’ve proved to myself that I can do something that’s very hard. It sounds insane, but I walked 450 miles across northern Spain and didn’t find it all that difficult. There were days where I struggled but it was fine. Then, when I was in Italy, I was much more alone, and it was way harder to walk. There was one day where it poured rain for six hours as I was crossing this 3000 foot mountain. It was hard! I had to realize that it’s probably good that it is hard in portions.
Some people go and have this transformative experience. My experience has been that I’ve met some amazing people who I’ll probably be friends with forever and, to me, that’s it. I don’t need to do anything else.
I had one realization, which is that I tend to not take things very seriously when I’m setting goals for myself. And now, I’ve actually set a goal and done this thing, which is cool. Especially being in DC, I think I tend to lead my life in a less traditional way…all my friends are – and I don’t mean this in a derogatory way – more normal. They have leases. They have jobs. I generally think of myself as just doing silly stuff, and I love doing silly stuff! But just because it isn’t traditional or normal, doesn’t mean it’s silly or frivolous.
Samuel: A few quick ones to close. What’s something you’re bad at?
Eric: Clearly, staying in one place for a significant period of time. And shutting up.
Samuel: You said earlier that part of what keeps you coming back to DC is that “people have rooms for me.” What does that mean to you?
Eric: I’m very lucky to have people that say: Yeah, Eric can stay with us. One of the nicest things you can do is to host someone in your home, whether it’s for a meal or to sleep. It’s one of the nicest things, and it’s heartwarming and wonderful that I have so many people willing to do that for me. It is an actual, physical demonstration of how I value my relationships more than anything else. More than anything else in my life. Like, I’ll drop everything to come to your wedding. What could be more important than me being here for this moment?
Samuel: What makes you a good wedding guest?
Eric: I will eat all the food. I will congratulate your parents. And I will not leave the dance floor.
Samuel: What’s something in the DMV that doesn’t get enough shine?
Eric: I love the National Portrait Gallery. It’s open late, which is great for going after work, and the Toni Morrison portrait they have is my favorite piece of art.
Samuel: We don’t need to talk about the Phillies during this interview, right?
Eric: Yeah, that’s fair.
Samuel: You can invite any three people to Shabbat dinner. Who are you bringing?
Eric: My grandma, Abraham Joshua Heschel, and Jackie Robinson.
Samuel: Last one. Finish the sentence: When Jews of the DMV gather…
Eric: It’s joyous.
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