If you’re on any of the online dating sites (and if you’re reading this, I assume you are), then you know that in reading profile after profile, sometimes you wonder if every person is simply a clone of the last. Somehow, everyone seems to be hiking in Peru, running marathons, or simply “curling up on the couch with a movie and a glass of wine.” Considering that I don’t think any of us are made up of the exact same DNA (except for you identical twins out there), why is it that every profile seems to be a replica of the last one? Let’s take a look at 10 Cliché Phrases to Avoid in Online Dating Profiles:
- I like to laugh and have fun.
I hope you like to laugh and have fun! Enough said.
- I’m just as comfortable in a little black dress (tux) as I am in jeans and a t-shirt.
This line is an attempt to show that you’re versatile. We get it. Most of us can pull off different types of outfits. Instead, talk about the things you like to do. Saying you love to go to the Kennedy Center versus a Nats game tells us a lot more about you.
- I’m just as happy going out on the town as I am staying in with a glass of wine and a movie.
Same comment for this one as #2, with this added advice: Stop trying to appeal to everyone. While it may seem counterintuitive, I’m going to give you permission to turn people off in your profile. Let that sink in for a second. It’s more important to be the real you, not the version you think people want to see, and certainly not the version that attempts to appeal to every single person on the site. Just be yourself. This way, you know that when someone shows interest, it’s because he or she likes the actual things you said, not just the fact that you were being inclusive.
- I love to travel.
Again, I don’t know many people who don’t. Do you like to go to the beach every weekend, or do prefer to climb glaciers in Iceland? These details say a lot more about you than a generic statement about travel.
- Family and friends are important to me.
I sure hope so! No need to say it because the assumption is that these people are important to you.
- I’m looking for a partner in crime.
Unless your name is Bonnie or Clyde, there’s no reason to write this overused cliché.
- My friends say I’m… (insert a list of adjectives).
Of course your friends say all of these fantastic things about you—they’re your friends! Also, this is a way of trying to appear humble, which can backfire in two ways: 1) it can make you appear less confident (do you not think these things about yourself?) or 2) it still sounds “braggy braggy,” as I like to say.
This also leads me to the “empty adjective” conversation, which you may remember from a couple years ago. An empty adjective is a word that you use (or your friends allegedly use, as the case may be) to describe yourself that can’t be proven until someone gets to know you. For example, I might say that I’m funny, but how would you know if that’s the truth? Maybe I’m funny to some people (the ones who love puns) but not to others.
- I’m down-to-earth.
I almost want to see a profile that instead says, “I’m kind of an airhead… but a sweet one.” Being “down-to-earth” is very subjective, again making it an empty adjective.
- I can’t believe I’m doing this.
This is a negative commentary on online dating. It reads to others, “I can’t believe I’ve stooped this low and am looking for a date online. Only losers are on here, so I guess I’m a loser now, too.” Online dating is a wonderful thing. Either embrace it, or hold off on joining an online dating site until you can embrace it.
- I love life
Just like #1, I hope you love life! Omitting the line “I love life” does not imply the opposite. It simply gives you more space to share those things that make your life so darn grand.
Now it’s time: Take a moment to review your profile (yes—even your Tinder and JSwipe ones!), and if you’ve used of these overused, cliché lines, it’s time to hit the backspace button and set yourself apart from the crowd.
Lastly, if you’re curious to know the most used word in online dating profiles in DC, it’s “international,” which isn’t surprising. Virginia’s is “military” (remember, the whole state isn’t made up of young people in Arlington), and Maryland’s is “gospel.” Feel free to check out the rest of the country here.